Course: English Composition (ENGL 1A) · Silver Oak University (fictional sample) · Prof. Lindgren
Module: Week 13 of 16 · Fall 2026 · in-person, two 75-minute sessions
Objective covered: Objective 7 — Revise globally (resee structure, thesis, and argument) and edit locally for style · SLO A (compose clear, well-organized, audience-aware prose)

This file holds two pieces: (A) the Module 13 Overview page ("Start Here") and (B) the Welcome Announcement that drips out when the module opens. Dates below assume a Tuesday/Thursday session pattern with Week 13 meeting Tue Nov 24, and end-of-week work due Sunday Nov 29, 11:59 p.m. Note the holiday: Thanksgiving is Thursday–Friday, Nov 26–27 — campus is closed both days, so this week's second session does not meet; we run the week's material in our Tuesday session and online, and the due date sits after the break. Adjust the day-of-week and times to match your section.

(A) Module 13 Overview — Start Here

Welcome to Week 13: Revision & Style

This is your home base for the week. Read it first, then work the checklist below from top to bottom. Everything you need is linked inside the module.

Last week you finished a full research-based argument. This week we do the thing that turns a finished draft into good writing: we revise. Not "fix the typos" — that's next week. This week is about re-seeing: stepping back from your own essay to ask the hard question, does this actually work? — and then sharpening the prose itself so every sentence earns its place. Two big ideas run the week: global revision (rethinking structure, thesis, argument, and evidence — the "does this work?" pass) versus local editing (sentences and surface, which we take up fully in Week 14), and style — the craft of concision, sentence variety, emphasis, and voice that makes writing clear and alive instead of long and limp.

The week's big question

"My draft is done — so why isn't it good yet? What's the difference between re-seeing my argument and polishing my commas, and how do I cut and shape sentences so they're stronger?"

By Sunday you'll be able to tell global revision from local editing, cut a wordy passage by about a quarter with no loss of meaning, and shape sentences for variety and emphasis.

By the end of this week, you can…

Use this as a checklist. If you can do all four out loud, you're ready for the quiz.

• [ ] Tell global revision from local editing — revision re-sees structure, thesis, argument, and evidence; editing fixes sentences and surface. (Callback to the Week-1 revision-vs-editing distinction — now deepened.)
• [ ] Cut for concision — find and remove wordiness, deadwood, redundancy, and empty intensifiers, shrinking a passage by roughly 25% without losing meaning.
• [ ] Vary your sentences — mix short and long, vary how sentences open, and combine choppy sentences into smoother ones.
• [ ] Use emphasis and voice — put the important idea in the main clause and at the emphatic end of the sentence, and choose active vs. passive voice on purpose (passive is a tool, not an error).

What's due this week, and when

Work these in order — each one gets you ready for the next.

Heads-up on the AI work: this week the AI-critique moment is a perfect trap. Ask a chatbot to "make this more concise and professional" and it will gladly hand you something shorter — but watch it strip out your voice into bland boilerplate, or quietly change what you meant. Cutting words is a skill; cutting meaning is a mistake. The tool drafts; you judge.

Late policy reminder: 10% off per day late. If life happens, reach out before the deadline — I'd much rather hear from you early.

A calendar note

Thanksgiving is Thursday–Friday, Nov 26–27, and campus is closed both days. That removes our usual second session this week, so we cover the week's material in our Tuesday Nov 24 session plus the module here, and the graded work is due after the break, Sun Nov 29. Enjoy the holiday — then bring an essay you can revise.

How to succeed this week

• Separate the two passes — really separate them. You cannot revise globally and edit locally at the same time; the brain that's hunting comma errors can't also see whether your whole argument is in the wrong order. Do the big pass first, the small pass second. (This is the Week-1 distinction, leveled up.)
• "Longer" is not "stronger." The single most common style fix is cutting. Concise writing isn't shorter for its own sake — it uses the strongest words and fires the dead ones. Aim to trim a passage by about a quarter and watch it get better.
• Read it aloud. Your ear hears wordiness, choppiness, and a buried point faster than your eye does. It's the cheapest revision tool you own.
• Passive voice isn't "wrong." "Mistakes were made" hides who acted — sometimes that's exactly what you want, sometimes it's evasion. Choose voice on purpose, don't ban it.
• End strong. Readers remember the last words of a sentence most. Put the idea you care about at the end, in the main clause — not buried in the middle.

You don't need anything new for this week — just a draft you're willing to take apart and rebuild. Bring last week's essay (or any draft) and come ready to argue about whether you can ever cut too much. See you Tuesday.

(B) Welcome Announcement — Module 13

Release setting: post on the module's start day (offset = 0 days), i.e., Mon Nov 23, 2026 — not before. If your platform won't preserve the scheduled date on import, post this as a draft labeled "Release: Mon Nov 23."

Subject: Week 13 — your draft is done. Now let's make it good. ✂️

Hi everyone,

Quick gut-check before we start. Read this sentence out loud: "In light of the fact that the committee made the decision to postpone the event, due to the reason that the weather was bad, we will be rescheduling it for a later date in the future." Painful, right? It's not wrong — every word is spelled correctly. It's just flabby. By the end of this week you'll cut a sentence like that by a quarter, in your sleep, without losing a thing.

This week — Revision & Style — we tackle the big question: My draft is done, so why isn't it good yet? The answer is the difference between global revision (re-seeing your structure and argument — does this actually work?) and local editing (polishing sentences — next week), plus the style moves that make prose strong: concision, sentence variety, emphasis, and choosing active vs. passive voice on purpose.

Four things not to miss:
1. Lecture Tutorial 13 — work through global vs. local revision, cutting wordiness, and shaping sentences with one approved chatbot (Gemini, Claude, or ChatGPT) and submit the share link. Due Sun Nov 29.
2. Quiz 13, Discussion 13, and Assignment 13 also close Sun Nov 29 — the discussion ("Can Concision Go Too Far?") is a quick AI dialogue you summarize and post, so start early and leave time to reply to classmates.
3. Writing Studio 13 — "Cut a Quarter, Then Reshape" — our weekly workshop. You'll take a wordy passage, cut it ~25% without losing meaning, then reshape it for variety and emphasis. This is the most useful fifteen minutes of the term for your own writing.
4. A calendar heads-up: Thanksgiving is Nov 26–27 and campus is closed, so our second session doesn't meet this week. We cover the material Tuesday and online; the work is due after the break, Sun Nov 29.

One promise: the difference between a C draft and an A draft is almost never more writing — it's re-seeing and sharpening what's already there. Learn to revise, and every essay you ever write gets better on the second pass.

Bring a draft you're willing to cut into (last week's essay is perfect), and a strong opinion about whether you can ever cut a piece of writing too much. See you Tuesday — and happy Thanksgiving.

See you soon,
Prof. Lindgren